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Some of the points which I will make in the following message
are lessons which I learnt personally between the end of
November 2000 and mid February –2001.
I sincerely feel and believe my conclusions to be true,
but I am aware that others can and some
will have different opinions. I accept that they are entitled to their views.
I am not saying that the points which I make are the last
or definitive word on the subject.
None the less I hope and pray that my experience
will be a blessing and comfort to you.
I hope that you will see the merciful involvement of the Eternal
and that you will also be able to give Him all the praise honour and glory,
which is His alone.
During the summer, I was aware that I was being carefully
prepared for something. I had no idea what it was, none at all.
Some time before the petrol crisis last summer,
I had been spending a lot of time endeavouring to get closer to God.
One result which I noticed was that more and more,
I was being isolated from people. I was in the wilderness.
Do not think that this was a negative place it was not.
Then came the petrol crisis.
Whilst most other people were running around trying to get petrol,
my car remained motionless on my drive for almost 2 months.
It was several weeks before my car was operational again.
It did not bother me. I simply walked wherever I could or stayed at home.
Then the phones started giving trouble which went on for weeks.
Conversations if possible were often inaudible or very short.
The problems with the phone line meant that email usage was minimal.
There were severe computer problems as computers crashed
and hard disks were destroyed. This completed the communication disruption.
There are many examples of people being separated, Moses, Paul,
right up to the whole nation of Israel.
I am not trying to elevate myself up to the level of these great people
but I am simply stating what I see as a principle.
During this period I felt and I still feel quite well and very positive.
It was also becoming clear to me, that the Eternal wanted me
to experience Him, not only as the Living God, the Creator,
and our Healer but also the God of the Resurrection.
John 11:25 Jesus said to her, I am the resurrection and the life:
he that believes on me, though he have died, shall live;
I did not spend much time thinking about it,
but from time to time I wondered how this was going to happen.
In November around the 14th my son Gary told me that
he was not feeling very well.
He was living in London but working in Manchester,
where he spent the week in a hotel and came home at weekends.
his was not too much of a problem. He was quite happy to do this.
However, suddenly everything went sadly wrong.
There was the petrol crisis which was followed by the rail crisis.
Journeys were a nightmare by road or rail.
Countless hours were spent travelling, as trains were cancelled.
Extensive speed restrictions on the trains caused many to seek
solutions by driving, which caused grid lock from time to time .
The excessive travelling tired him out and made him unwell.
When Gary checked with his doctor he said that he thought
that he had a kidney infection.
One evening around November 23rd one of his friends encouraged him
to go to hospital as he looked very unwell.
They admitted him to hospital and tried to help him with very little effect.
I was told not to worry.
As the phone call advising me of this was in the evening,
I said that I would be down the next day.
He had walked into the hospital on his own steam and
next morning he had actually walked to the bathroom and had a shower.
However when I arrived, I found him in great distress with pain in
his stomach area which would not be alleviated.
He was tugging at his tummy to try and lessen the pain.
He said, “Dad help me”,
I sensed in my spirit that there was something negative in the environment
so I prayed about it and the negative atmosphere eventually lifted.
I drove back to my home to Northampton around 70 miles,
a journey which Natasha, my youngest daughter, and I,
would make many times over the next few weeks in the most appalling weather.
Around midnight of that day I had a phone call from the nurse in charge of the
Intensive care unit telling me that Gary had been moved to intensive care.
I thanked her for calling and went back to sleep.
I had already handed the whole situation over to God and
I certainly was not going to take it back.
In the period of time in the hospital I never did.
Others were searching books trying to get advice here, there and everywhere.
My point of view was and is that the Eternal whom I serve knows everything.
Isaiah 46:10 Declaring the end from the beginning,
and from ancient times the things that are not yet done, saying,
My counsel shall stand, and I will do all my pleasure:
Christ clearly said our hairs were individually numbered not even just counted.
Matthew 10:30 But the very hairs of your head are all numbered.
Whether we can grasp it or not,
God knows absolutely everything about everything.
Matthew 10:29 Are not two sparrows sold for a farthing?
and one of them shall not fall on the ground without your Father.
We are clearly told that He knows our needs before we do.
Matthew 6:8 Be not ye therefore like unto them: for your Father
knows what things ye have need of, before ye ask him.
My mind goes into a tail spin if I even dare to start, to try, to begin,
to understand His might, power, awesomeness and majesty.
If you pray, do you carefully identify yourself so that He knows
who is speaking to Him? If you pray for others do you carefully
identify them so that there is no mix up?
From the countless people who call on Him daily at the same time,
how does He and hear and respond to people individually and yet
look after his entire creation?
How does he despatch angels which are numberless,
before the event in order to protect us?
How does he maintain, and order the named countless stars ?
And on and on it goes.
In His sovereign will, He appoints times for absolutely everything.
The fact that we have not a clue is neither here nor there.
Job did not know anything about the reason why disaster befell him.
The reality is that it was ordained.
God in His sovereign will permitted it.
Therefore I cannot agree with those who teach that we live our lives
under time and chance.
This reasoning is the result of taking the end of a sentence
and applying it to everything. This verse should be read in context.
Ecclesiastes 9:11 I returned, and saw under the sun,
that the race is not to the swift,
nor the battle to the strong, neither yet bread to the wise,
nor yet riches to men of understanding,
nor yet favour to men of skill;
but time and chance (Rotherham - accident) happens to them all.
This is an excellent reason why we should not gamble and bet.
It is a classic application of “judge not”.
Appearances are very deceptive.
World champions do not always win their events.
By observation we would expect Goliath to destroy David.
99.99% of the world would have bet on Goliath against David.
The whole army of Israel certainly would have.
His victory must have scrambled their brains.
Many inventors and ‘great’ men die in poverty.
When you observe the leaders and the rich and you hear them
open their mouths, you often wonder how ever did they achieve
the things which they did.
Computer programs often say “What You See Is What You Get”.
I assure you that this is rarely the case.
The labour required to get these to appear as you see them is unbelievable.
In reality and in life this is rarely the case.
What you see is not what you are going to get.
Often when producing documents, the text seems to be in a perfectly
straight line on the screen but when it is printed,
one line will be out of alignment.
In order for it to print correctly I have to make it appear on the screen
out of alignment and then it will print properly.
Which school teacher does not control the lessons to be learnt
and then gives an exam?
It may appear to us to be time and chance but to God absolutely
nothing is time and chance.
Job himself did not regard it as time and chance,
neither did he blame God.
Job 10:2 I will say unto God, Do not condemn me;
show me wherefore you strive with me.
He did not sin with his mouth.
It is true that he complained but on the contrary he blessed God,
and he was fully aware that God had permitted his problems,
although he did not know why.
Read the whole book to see the whole picture.
Job 2:10 ……In all this Job did not sin with his lips.
Job 1:21 and he said, Naked came I out of my mother’s womb,
and naked shall I return thither: Jehovah gave,
and Jehovah has taken away; blessed be the name of Jehovah!
Often we complain and bellyache continuously when the fact is
that we are only experiencing minor aggravation or irritation.
In a moment Job was confronted by devastating major disasters.
We also need to realise that Job had not done anything wrong.
He was not being punished.
We quickly say that he was self-righteous,
but oh that we were as upright as he was.
God was doing a great work in him and this required that
he went through a process in order to grow in Grace an Knowledge.
Which He acknowledged that he had.
Job 42:5 I have heard of thee by the hearing of the ear:
but now mine eye sees Thee.
Unfortunately that is where most are today, they have heard but do not see.
This gives the health and wealth preachers and advocates of law keeping
to receive blessings a very real problem.
Many people out of kindness and love have said to me:
How can one person have to go through so much and in such a short time.
The answer to that is that I did not go through these events on my own.
It is the Christ living in me that strengthened me.
If this was not the case without any question,
I would have broken long ago.
You see it on the TV and newspapers all the time.
A single event destroying an individual.
This is not something unique to me at all,
but is the case for every Christian if they would allow
Christ to operate in their lives. You will hurt but you will be victorious.
This is something that will take our entire life just
to start to understand and experience this.
2 Corinthians 12:9 And he said unto me,
My grace is sufficient for thee:
for my strength is made perfect in weakness.
Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities,
that the power of Christ may rest upon me.
Galatians 2:20 I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live;
yet not I, but Christ lives in me:
and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith
of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me.
Grace is none other than Christ.
It is imperative that we go through experiences because
we can only help others in direct relation to what we have experienced.
If all you know is theology that is all you can teach.
If all you know is law that is all you can teach.
If all you know is ritual, form and procedure, that is all you can teach.
If you have experienced the reality of Christ living in you,
you can teach and pass on life
so that others can experience the same thing.
That is part of our calling.
Those who think that we are called just to ‘get people saved’
are only seeing half of the story.
Those who think that we are called just to look forward
to the future are in the same boat.
Both of these cases are missing the opportunity for Christ living in us
which causes us to grow in Grace and Knowledge.
You can study and read as many books as you like.
and still not grow in Grace and Knowledge.
As a matter of fact if you are blind,
the more you study the more blind you become.
A classic example of this is as follows.
Consider the excellently photographed nature programs.
The more experienced the producers,
the more ridiculous their comments on evolution become.
It requires that we humble ourselves and that we accept
that we do not know everything.
It is not an accident that Christ healed many people
who were physically blind.
The physical mirrors the spiritual,
and it requires a miracle to remove spiritual blindness even
after you are ‘saved’.
Your heart has to right before your mind will be right.
What do I mean by your ‘heart’?
By this I mean the seat of your emotions where love,
hate, envy, jealousy, anger etc., dwells,
as opposed to the thinking process.
If you are filled with negative qualities,
it will not be possible for your sound mind to operate properly.
You will stagnate and be stunted although
you might in your own eyes feel quite differently.
To be saved is only the beginning of journey
and not the arrival at our final destination.
The second thing which has occurred more often
is that many have said what is happening to you, just is not fair.
You are such a nice person, you do not deserve these things happen to you.
They then tend to cite, you help, encourage others etc..
I am not for a moment criticising their heartfelt comments
which I greatly appreciate.
However, it is clear to me is that the sentiments expressed
pleasant though they are, are in reality, a camouflaged concept of works.
When God is moving you on, He is moving you on.
It has nothing to do with what you have done.
An SAS man who suddenly finds himself in the frontline of the battle
cannot rely on the fact that he went to Sunday school
and helped little old ladies.
It is not part of the equation at all.
He had better be prepared to fight and use
all the training which he had drummed into him.
When David confronted Goliath it was no good him telling Goliath,
be careful I killed a bear and a lion.
His past exploits got him where he was,
but that was of no help to him at that time.
What was important was that he came in the name of the Lord.
1 Samuel 17:45 And David said to the Philistine,
You come to me with sword, and with spear, and with javelin;
but I come to thee in the name of Jehovah of hosts,
the God of the armies of Israel, whom you have defied.
Do not think that this is just a cold analytical appraisal.
It is not.
I assure that hurt and pain are involved.
To those people who say you have to grieve.
Of course you do.
Do not let outward appearances cause you to jump to false conclusions.
The hurt comes in waves but you are greatly strengthened
to let them break over you and yet to still be standing after it passes.
I also need to make it clear that the life of suffering
to which we are called is not suffering
which we bring on ourselves by our disobedience, ignorance or foolishness,
but rather suffering in furtherance of the gospel.
The things that I am going through are part and parcel of life.
Others suffer similar things.
Maybe the concentration individually is less for most people.
However, this is allocated by God and He strengthens us accordingly.
To me, my actual experience makes many scriptures very real indeed.
Bible in Basic English 1 Corinthians 10:13
You have been put to no test but such as is common to man:
and God is true,
who will not let any test come on you which you are not able to undergo;
but He will make with the test a way out of it,
so that you may be able to go through it.
Rotherham 1 Corinthians 10:13
Trial, has not taken you, save such as man can bear;
faithful, moreover is God,
who will not suffer you to be tried above what ye are able, but will make,
with the trial, also the way of escape, that ye may be able to hold out.
The next day I was back in Homerton Hospital, in Hackney,
Gary was in a coma, attached to every conceivable monitor and piece
of equipment to keep him alive.
I joked and said if he had a bad thought I was sure that they would know.
A machine was breathing for him, which meant there was a large uncomfortable,
hose down his throat. A dialysis machine was purifying his blood.
As I sat by his bed the nurses explained everything to me.
I thanked them for what they were doing.
I appreciated that they were doing their best
but I knew that they are not God and they could make mistakes.
But God was in over all charge regardless of what they did.
They explained the difficulties which they faced
as they tried to balance his treatment.
It seems as if he had also picked up an infection in the hospital,
but that is the nature of the environment.
If you put lots of sick and very sick people in a building,
it can hardly be a surprise that in spite of various disciplines,
it is still a dangerous place to be.
In any case, I was confident that he would get better.
I believe that God’s ultimate will for us that we are in health.
As I sat quietly at his bedside, the thought came into my head.
There you are Peter, that’s your son there critically ill,
and you can do nothing about it. This was obviously true.
You can now experience a little how I felt about My Son
when He was on the earth and He suffered and died.
I could have done something about it but I chose not to do so.
I could see that there was a small parallel there.
I took the point.
Gary’s blood sugar had gone to 40 parts per thousand.
It should be around 5.
The days passed and he remained stable with the sugar count slowly reducing.
The coma continued and so did the visits.
After many days it was decided that they would do an operation to put
the breathing hose through his throat as they felt that it would
cause him less distress. The operation was planned for Tuesday.
However, on Tuesday two other emergencies in the operating theatre
prevented this and it was rescheduled for Friday.
He did not really need another intrusion into his body.
Bear in mind that he had never been ill or in hospital before,
and he did not even have a filling in his teeth.
Surprisingly on the Thursday they now considered not operating,
but actually taking the air tube out all together and taking him
off the respirator.
The Eternal was again showing quite clearly His involvement in this situation.
This was an unexpected dramatic change.
If he had the operation I understand that it would be several months
before we could expect him to speak again. That was not a part of the plan.
It was a couple of days before he could speak clearly due to the damage
from the large air pipe, but his voice rapidly got better.
Very quickly he was taken off one monitor or life support system or another.
Around the 16th of December, he was in a normal ward.
One of the consultants told him that he had been seriously ill,
I interjected and said you mean that he had come back from the dead,
which was true.
The rapid progress continued.
Many of his friends visited him.
There was much chatting and laughter in the ward as he ate his
favourite West Indian food, which friends brought to him.
He had also seen three people die, this was sobering but he took it in his stride.
On December 26th his birthday things took yet another a dramatic turn.
His landlord who had phoned me expressing his sympathy and saying a few days
previously how he was like a son to him and a good hard working tenant.
Suddenly his attitude changed.
He wanted him out of the property immediately.
He had rented the property for four years at an exorbitant rate.
Turning him out was illegal and in fact a criminal offence not to mention immoral.
This is an offence that results in automatic arrest.
I knew that we could win a legal case and yet lose all his possessions.
Therefore I telephoned two friends and with Natasha
my youngest daughter and her boyfriend within a couple of hours
we had started to arrive in London to secure his possessions.
Due to obstruction by the Landlord,
Natasha had to call the police to evict the Landlord from the premises.
As I said they should have been arrested not just put of the property.
Meanwhile I went to the hospital and told Gary there is a problem.
With many of his friends around the bed, I said, I am sorry,
and I know that it is your birthday,
but I explained the situation and said I will secure everything that you own
and you can come and recuperate with me
(as I expected to happen in any case) when you leave hospital, goodbye.
That conversation was over in a couple of minutes.
I was now operating on a different frequency.
One which few people have seen.
It was after midnight when we had completely cleared the three floors
of his rented accommodation.
By 3.00 am we were back in Northampton with everything unloaded
into my home. The weather which had been quite bad had cleared
for that one day to give us a cold but clear and dry night to move everything.
As this was an unplanned move.
Things were just put into black bin bags and cardboard boxes.
Mounds of electronic cables, books, clothes, electronic equipment,
computers, and documents.
It was going to be sometime before everything was sorted out.
Friends took some things to addresses in London.
With hind sight it is clear that the Eternal intervened again and allowed
him to be evicted. The point is that my view is that his allotted time,
had, as it were expired since November and we were in a period of grace.
at the rate he was getting better he might feel that he could
move back to his rented accommodation and arrange to get help.
This would have been a disaster as when the appointed time was finally up
he would either be in hospital or in his house.
Both of these were not good, with being at his home the worst option.
He might have died and not be found for days.
Instead he was where he would have wanted to be.
When he was asked have you any one to look after you his reply
was ‘My Dad’, and that is what happened.
Natasha and her friend Greg visited Gary regularly in spite of the weather
and picking up two parking fines around £160 in the process.
The rail situation prevented Sharon my eldest daughter from coming to London
when she wanted to do so. But we kept in close contact all the time.
The days flashed by and the progress continued at a great rate.
I sent out emails keeping people posted as my computer allowed.
Things were looking very good.
One day when I was driving home, I managed to hear Witness Lee on the radio.
He is a favourite mentor of mine.
He was speaking about ‘The Burnt Offering’ in Leviticus 6.
Leviticus 6:9 Command Aaron and his sons, saying,
This is the law of the burnt-offering;
this, the burnt-offering, shall be on the hearth on the altar all night
unto the morning, and the fire of the altar shall be kept burning on it.
10 And the priest shall put on his linen raiment, and his linen breeches
shall he put on his flesh, and take up the ashes to which the fire has
consumed the burnt-offering on the altar,
and he shall put them beside the altar.
11 And he shall put off his garments, and put on other garments,
and carry forth the ashes without the camp unto a clean place.
Christ was the reality of all the offerings mentioned in this book,
this includes the burnt offering.
He said we are expected to become burnt offerings if we are truly
following Christ. Do not think always think that when something negative
happens to you that God is punishing you.
It can be that He has accepted you and you will again suffer,
and what appears to be a great negative set back is not a set back,
but this is showing his acceptance of you.
The burnt offering was very important.
It was completely burnt and the ashes were very special.
So special in fact that the High Priest had to change his garments
when dealing with them.
I can tell you exactly where I heard this.
It was in Enfield, London, very near to where I used to live.
As soon as I heard this, I knew deep within my spirit
that this was meant for me.
Something else dramatic or even traumatic was going to happen.
I could not imagine what.
Gary had been brought back from the dead.
This was far more dramatic than just ‘healing’.
Whilst he was in intensive care and in the ward,
I had prayed for people and God had intervened and healed them.
I did not know what was to happen, where or when,
but I told some of my close friends my expectation.
In hospital he was having his favourite meals continued to be brought to him
by his friends instead of the hospital food.
On Wednesday January 10th I drove to London to bring him
back to Northampton.
He wondered how he would get into the car.
He was greatly surprised, how easily that happened.
The drive was an easy one.
He wondered even more how he would get upstairs,
but unbelievably he got upstairs.
He had 3 very good days, listening to his music,
phoning his friends and having visitors and chatting to Natasha, friends and I.
His genuine complaint was that the house was too quiet and
he wanted some noise such as a trolley being pushed around during the night.
He was quite serious.
The best I could offer was some tape recorded bird song,
which I played at 2.00am.
On Saturday I was quite relaxed and went to a meeting leaving him on his own
with access to me by mobile phone.
That evening some of my friends visited him and were thrilled
to see how well he was.
They could hardly believe how ill he had been.
His face looked the best he had looked for years.
Around 5.00am Sunday morning he awakened and went to the bathroom.
He called and said that he did not feel well.
I was there in an instant.
He felt that his blood sugar might be a little low as the previous night it was
down to 6 parts per thousand.
I gave him a small amount of coke which is supposed to be the best thing.
I told him that he looked a bit pale.
He said he could not make it back to his bedroom although it is only
a few feet away. He said that he would lie down in the passage.
Quickly I got a quilt and two pillows for his head.
He lay down with his stomach moving greatly.
I asked should I call an ambulance? He said no.
Then he said I cannot control my breathing or my heart.
I put my hand on his chest.
He said that it felt good.
I think you had better call the ambulance.
I did that immediately.
Within 10 minutes they were here.
Suddenly his head went back and he was dead.
It was as quickly as that.
The ambulance people worked heroically to revive him without any success.
I stayed in my room and did my favourite activity.
I looked out of the window and prayed.
I checked with them and they said that ‘He is not responding is he?’
they said ‘no’ but continued.
I knew it was all over.
We strapped him to a chair and lifted him downstairs and took him
to the hospital.
It was all over.
I will now go back a little.
When he was on the floor this is what happened to me.
I was alone and I knew that we were in a crisis situation.
The thought came into my mind what are you going to do?
He said lets check my sugar.
I hastened to find the equipment.
When I did find it he did not have the strength to do it,
and I had never done it before.
The next thought was, are you going to ask him if he believes
in the Lord Jesus and if he accepts Christ as his Saviour?
I had written a document ‘Then you die’ but it did not address
the situation regarding people who had not really had an opportunity
to officially as it were accept Christ.
This was something no one talked about any way.
I knew what the vast majority of fellowships said.
I also knew what my own fellowship had said but I did not feel
that I could adequately defend the position although I agreed with the conclusion.
The next exceedingly strong thought that came into my mind was that
you will do no such thing.
Surely you can see that is ridiculous?
That is legalism and ritual.
It is not right.
You have to realise that this was not a theoretical discussion
in pleasant surroundings when whatever decision did not matter.
This was staring actual life and death straight in the face.
I was alone.
There was no one there to get a second opinion.
In any case everything was happening exceedingly quickly.
In a few minutes it was all finished.
So, I simply went about the business in hand.
Later that day a scripture was put forcefully into my mind.
.. in due time Christ died for the ungodly.
The complete verse follows:
Av Romans 5:6 For when we were yet without strength,
in due time Christ died for the ungodly.
Weymouth Romans 5:6 For already, while we were still helpless,
Christ at the right moment died for the ungodly.
Youngs Literal translation Romans 5:6 For in our being still ailing,
Christ in due time did die for the impious;
I was not judging my son.
It was a matter of enlightenment to me and obviously the implications
far exceeded my own situation.
I realised fully that there was a time called the ‘due time’.
Before that due time there were ungodly people who never heard off,
nor knew about Christ.
After that due time there have been and will be ungodly people.
Christ died for all the ‘ungodly’ on both sides of the ‘due time’,
which is when He died.
It is not that Christ died only for the ungodly,
who have been called, and that the others are lost.
It does not say that.
It is written Christ died for the ungodly, period.
I am not for one moment suggesting that we can live whatsoever type
of evil life we lead and it does not matter.
Far from it.
There will always be discipline and some will be saved by severe discipline.
However, discipline and salvation will take place at Christ’s appointed time.
That is not our business.
This is also another occasion when we do not want to judge
and come to conclusions about who is saved and who is lost.
Someone can be carrying out what appears to be an unseemly act and
we condemn the person when in fact they are carrying out
the Eternal’s wishes. An example of this is Pharoah.
We are told that God hardened his heart.
Later that same day another thought came to me again, ‘Consider Job’.
Well Job was the most upright man on the planet.
When God said to Satan have you considered my servant Job?
He did not say which one?
When God allowed Satan to have a go at Job he promptly destroyed
his seven sons and three daughters in a moment.
Now Job worried about the conduct of his children and he used to sacrifice
in case they had sinned when they had their parties.
Now I cannot accept that God would permit such a disaster to overtake
upright Job and let his children be lost just to make a point.
I feel that often we have made God to be some sort of vicious monster
just waiting to swat us for any and every misdemeanour.
I am fully convinced that Job will be reunited with his children
which he had before calamity befell him together with those born to him
at the end of his ordeal.
His second set of children could not replace the first set.
It does not work like that.
Our calling is at the time appointed by God and not one second before.
I can go further.
When some one is blind the more that person studies,
the greater is the darkness and the blindness which will engulf them.
This is because of the faulty foundation on which they are building.
This is a very good reason for us to resist asking the Eternal
to help us to be patient, gracious, love, peace, etc.
Often people admit that when they pray for help things actually get worse !
We need to ask Christ to be our Comforter, Righteousness, Patience,
Peace, Love, Etc. He cannot and will not build on a faulty foundation.
Hebrews 11:10 For he looked for a city which hath foundations,
whose builder and maker is God.
We can preach all we want and unless God is calling those to whom
we are preaching we will not make a single convert.
I listen with wonderment when I hear of the various plans that people
make to achieve church growth.
I confess that I do not understand such schemes.
I view it as if I made plans to make some structural changes to your home.
I am sure that if I turned up with some plans and a builder,
you would not be amused one little bit.
But that is exactly what we do in the various churches, claiming that this is ‘vision’.
We study, measure and evaluate what we feel causes growth.
We even go as far as to try to incorporate into the church practices
That management of organisations in the world uses.
We forget that the entire world system is of the enemy.
We forget that we should be walking in the opposite direction to the world.
1 Corinthians 3:19 For the wisdom of this world is foolishness with God.
For it is written, He takes the wise in their own craftiness.
2 Corinthians 4:4 In whom the god of this world hath blinded the minds
of them which believe not, lest the light of the glorious gospel of Christ,
who is the image of God, should shine unto them.
1 John 5:4 For whatsoever is born of God overcomes the world:
and this is the victory that overcomes the world, even our faith.
We are told the end of the matter in Revelation.
Revelation 11:15 And the seventh angel sounded;
and there were great voices in heaven, saying,
The kingdoms of this world are become the kingdoms of our Lord,
and of his Christ; and He shall reign for ever and ever.
We are not told that the kingdoms of our Lord are become the kingdoms
of this world, but rather the opposite.
The kingdom of light will completely blow away the kingdom of darkness.
Nothing whatsoever of darkness will remain regardless of how wonderful
we might think it is.
I have been telling anyone who would listen that the only way that
I have survived all the various traumas is by
asking Christ to let me experience Him in a real way.
I also ask to let me represent Him, express Him, manifest Him and satisfy Him.
The end result of this surprises me, and often leaves those around me dumbfounded.
Now on the morning that Gary died,
It was three hours before I was able to contact anyone.
I was still very much alone.
I knew that many would be devastated by the news,
especially as he had been doing so well and the sudden collapse.
I knew that those who had spoken to him the previous evening
would be hit terribly hard.
I knew that those people who I help all over the country would be confused
especially those whom God had blessed with healing at my request.
I knew the people to whom I would have to speak.
The reactions were exactly what I expected.
I gave reassurance and encouragement to all who called.
One of my friends was devastated as I expected that he would be.
In distress, in his quiet time he prayed about my situation
and this is the response that God gave him.
He faxed me this document which I will quote in full.
However, I did not receive the fax but I got a copy of the day
after the funeral almost two weeks later.
I am very glad that I did not receive it because it confirmed what
I had been telling everyone over the previous few days.
My friend said:
“Father how you must love and value Peter, with the tests you are putting on him?”
Norman, death is only “sleep”!
(1 Thessalonians 4:13-16);
13 ¶ But we do not wish you to be ignorant, brethren,
concerning them that are fallen asleep, to the end that
you be not grieved even as also the rest who have no hope.
14 For if we believe that Jesus has died and has risen again,
so also God will bring with him those who have fallen asleep through Jesus.
15 (For this we say to you in the word of the Lord, that *we*,
the living, who remain to the coming of the Lord,
are in no way to anticipate those who have fallen asleep;
16 for the Lord himself, with an assembling shout,
with archangel’s voice and with trump of God,
shall descend from heaven; and the dead in Christ shall rise first;
Matthew 27:52 And the graves were opened;
and many bodies of the saints which slept arose,
John 11:11) These things said he: and after that he said unto them,
Our friend Lazarus sleeps; but I go, that I may awake him out of sleep.
Gary’s spirit is in MY care
(Eccl 12:7). Then shall the dust return to the earth as it was:
and the spirit shall return unto God who gave it.
Peter and Natasha just need to wait patiently,
(At this time Norman did not know my other daughter Sharon)
for that day when they will be re-united with Gary in My glorious Kingdom.
I could have healed Gary through Peter’s faith alone;
but that was not part of My Plan for Gary.
In order to receive anything form Me, whether it is salvation,
healing or any other of life’s spiritual gifts,
the person requiring the gift must have the faith to receive that gift,
I had not yet appointed for Gary to have that degree of faith.
It was not his time.
The time now is for strengthening Peter’s, your own and
the faith of many others, so that you can all draw closer to Me.
Through this you will all grow in Grace and Knowledge of Me.
You must know that Gary’s death is a merciful act of mine.
This must be seen by the ‘eye of faith’, and will become apparent in time.
Watchman Nee: “ There is death in nature, death in us, death from Satan.
The earth lies under a curse
(Genesis 3:17) And unto Adam he said, Because you have hearkened
unto the voice of thy wife, and have eaten of the tree,
of which I commanded thee, saying, You shall not eat of it:
cursed is the ground for thy sake;
in sorrow shall you eat of it all the days of thy life;
It is therefore ruled by that curse.
If we desire to live victoriously on this earth,
we will have to overcome death which is in the world. Death is in our body”.
Gary had not yet the faith to overcome death; but in My Mercy,
he will eventually overcome death by
My Resurrection of his body in My timing !
At Present Gary only sleeps !
The death I am talking about is the “final death”,
and that Gary will never experience.
This is the reality of the situation.
Believe this !
Satan has not got Gary’s spirit.
I hold it safely ! (Eccl. 12:7)
I will re-clothe his spirit with a totally new body at the right time.
Watchman Nee. “ Do not view death merely as a ‘crisis’,
it is pre-eminently a progressive matter.
It, “death”, is already in us and is gradually and relentlessly devouring us.
But this can be reversed to prolong our days through faith !”
(After receiving these thoughts my friend searched for the scriptures
which are high lighted in red and which he thought supported the thoughts
which he received. I have added the scriptures)
The above are amazing comments with some exceedingly powerful points
some of which run directly contrary to the teachings of much of Christendom.
1. Gary’s spirit is in MY care.
It does not say Gary’s soul is in my care, but rather his spirit.
We are told that there is a spirit in man.
Job 32:8 But there is a spirit which is in man;
and the breath of the Almighty gives them understanding.
We are told that the spirit goes back to God
who gave it in the first place.
Ecclesiastes 12:7 Then shall the dust return to the earth as it was:
and the spirit shall return unto God who gave it.
2. Healing requires faith by the one who is doing the praying.
3. God has a plan for each one of us and not just a global plan,
but rather a very specific plan.
4. To receive you must believe.
5. Whereas we subscribe to time and chance,
we have a confirmation that there is an appointed time for everything.
A time to laugh, a time to cry, a time to sow and a time to reap.
There is even an appointed time to have ‘faith’, and Faith is Jesus Christ.
It is no wonder we should ‘Judge Not’.
Ecclesiastes 3:1 To every thing there is a season,
and a time to every purpose under the heaven.
6. The desire of God’s heart is intimacy with us, not works,
not legalism, not ritual.
Jesus Christ is Grace.
He wants us to experience him in a very real way and not just as an
intellectual, theological exercise.
7. Without the slightest shadow of doubt I know that this whole situation
was merciful from the beginning and even more so at the end.
Of course it was sad, but Gary did not have to go through the pain and
suffering which my sister and mother experienced before they died.
8. I have already seen exactly what was meant by seeing the situation
through the eye of faith.
9. Watchman Nee’s comments are very pertinent.
There is no question that the earth is under a curse and has been
since the time of Eden.
If we are honest, our experience tells us that we are all suffering
in one way or another from the curses that exist.
It is foolish to pretend that we are not all groaning because we are Christians.
In fact the opposite true.
For us the road is narrow and very hard and difficult,
but we cope because it is not I but Christ lives His life through us.
10. Death is already working in us every day.
11. It is not a matter that if you do not get saved now before you die you are lost.
It is rather at God’s appointed time you will be called.
That is His business not ours,
although of course we have to carry out our commission. Mark 16.
If you reject that calling to life and chose death that is a different matter.
As illustrated earlier it is not for us to judge who is lost and who is saved.
The Father calls whom He wills, when He wills.
We can take any action which we might feel will cause growth
and the more action we take the more we see the congregation dwindle
to a tiny fraction of what it was in the past, right before our very eyes.
12. God is not some vindictive monster just waiting to swat us
into oblivion at the drop of a hat.
Rather in His great love and mercy, He sent Christ to die in our place.
13. We are blessed in spite of ourselves and what we do,
and not because of who we are, or what we do.
If we were dealt with according to our transgressions,
our sins would totally obliterate any blessings that we might like
to think we ought to receive.
The classic example is the children of Israel.
They moaned and complained about their situation in Egypt
and God sent them a deliverer.
They spoiled the Egyptians and received their wealth which
they never earned. They were freed to keep a feast in the desert.
Instead their moaning continued for 40 solid years,
yet they were blessed every single day.
They were blessed out of the Grace of God and certainly not
because of what they said or did but rather in spite of it.
We really do need to appreciate that our works and righteousness
are but filthy rags.
To think that we are better than others for any reason
is a great folly indeed. We are to consider others better than ourselves.
Philippians 2:3 Let nothing be done through strife or vainglory;
but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than themselves.
14. We need to recognise that the important things that we should do today,
must be done today.
Tomorrow may be too late.
Windows of opportunity must be grasped when they occur.
For some tomorrow will not come.
Never presume life.
If you do, one day you will be left sorrowing saying ‘If only’.
15. Never make the mistake of valuing things above people.
16. Never make the mistake of thinking that your position is worse
than anyone else’s. It is not true.
There are others who have gone through much worse than you have.
17. Do not treat someone who has gone through such a trauma
as if they have an infectious disease.
They are the same person they were before the tragedy struck.
18. Be careful not to spout scripture that is most inappropriate at that time.
Of course the scripture is true.
But someone who is going through the trauma of coping with
the distress of a death does not need to hear the fact that
you know a particular scripture:
For example “All things work together for good”.
They may well know the scripture themselves,
but it does not eliminate the present pain.
It might even smack of self righteousness.
It is far better to simply say that you are sorry and that you are hurting too.
19. The cards, emails, and phone calls which I received must be around 200.
I greatly appreciate every one of them.
The people who had the courage to write a brief note confirmed to me
that the impact of a note far exceeds a card.
It is a far more difficult thing to do, but well worth the effort.
The above points in one way or another came into my mind during this period.
During this period from the end of November to almost the end of February,
the problems have continued.
Natasha’s car window was broken right outside our house.
She also had a front wheel tire fail, probably after an emergency stop.
Two computer hard disks were destroyed, we are not certain how.
On overcoming the second problem the computer
was immediately hit by a virus.
I rang up to claim for damage to my computer system and also
to increase my house insurance to find that for some reason and without
my knowledge, my policy had been cancelled.
So not only I could not claim but for months the house was uninsured.
I could be offered no reason or explanation.
I broke a tooth which lasted over a month.
Sharon my eldest daughter suffered some very disturbing ill health
before the funeral which caused us to have to rush her to the doctor twice.
She recovered in time.
My ex- wife’s mother died a few later, causing even more stress on the family.
I was advised that my remaining work contract was being terminated.
So life continues to be interesting.
But to be absolutely honest I feel very well and at peace.
All thanks and praise to the Eternal God who has made this possible.
There is an interesting scripture with which I will close.
Romans 4:5 But to him that works not,
but believeth on him that justifies the ungodly,
his faith is counted for righteousness.
We can be certain that everything only lasts for a while.
It will not last forever. We know this too will pass.